During my sophomore year of college, I was privileged enough to have lived next to a handsome, Greek-like track runner with a killer smile. Much to my surprise, not only was he unlike the other obnoxious a-holes we were forced to coexist with in a prison-styled dormitory for an entire year, he was extremely nice and well-mannered. I thought we had some sort of unspoken connection, and by connection I mean attraction. I was wrong, of course, but not defeated.
If anything, that experience, which happened more than two years ago, taught me more about how to tell if the person you’re eying is actually eying you too, but in real life this time.
So, to spare you that sort of embarrassment only to live and write about it in the future, here are some ways to tell if that special someone is really into you:
1. Does he know that you exist?
Probably the most important teller of them all, Does he notice you? And by notice, I don’t mean the two of you have crossed each other’s paths by way of mutual friendship. I mean does he actually acknowledge your presence? If he makes a genuine effort to compliment you on your attire, ask what you’re up to and occasionally invites you out with friends sometimes. Which brings me to my next point.
2. Does he always ask you to “hang out” with him?
Okay, so maybe “hanging out” is not the same as a date but at least he’s inviting you to go along with him. That means something, right? Spending quality time with him or being introduced to his inner circle of friend is a big move on his part, so if he’s willing to include you in something like that, he absolutely wants to get to know you better!
3. Does he have a girlfriend?
The second most important factor in telling whether the guy you’ve been eying really likes you is if he’s available. Meaning: Single. If you really think this guy’s a catch and he’s the exact dreamboat you’ve been hoping to couple up with, chances are he does have a girlfriend. And though we don’t want to intrude on something like that, I’ve been working on a little tricky, nonchalant way of asking a guy whether he’s got a girlfriend without things taking a turn for the awkward. If there’s ever a moment where he makes you laugh, jokingly respond with: “You’re so funny. Your girlfriend’s so lucky to have someone with a sense of humor.” Assuming that he already has a girlfriend without him telling you first will open up the floodgates to dire answers you’ve been waiting to hear.
4. Is he mean or nice to you?
Hopefully he’s not a jerk to begin with, because the last thing you want to pursue is a handsome jerk. But if you’ve gotten this far, him not having a girlfriend and asking you to hang around, then chances are he’s not. That’s a great sign! Usually guys are pretty easy to approach, and unless you did something unimaginable to make him treat you so nasty, he’s not going to see any reason in not being nice to you. But just because he’s nice to you doesn’t mean he is for sure hoping to move things with you to a deeper, more intimate level. Keep this in mind for the next step.
5. What does his body language say?
Last but not least, if a guy is into you his body language will say so. This one is also a little hard to decipher seeing as so many guys out there these days are having more “girl friends” than ever, which makes reading his body language all the more difficult when you’re trying to figure out if he likes you more than a friend. If he keeps his touches gentle, carefully planned and respectful of your body, like your hair or your arm, he knows his limits. If he seems a little flushed when you come around or he likes being close to you in front of friends, he’s probably interested in more than just a friendship but he’s too shy to say so.
I’m hoping some of these indicators will help you to find out whether that special guy is digging you and that you score big with him.
Photo credit: adapted from Purple Sherbet Photography | Flickr